Saturday, May 22, 2010

Reader Mail: A Hospice Visitor / The Fragrance of Flowers


I am a Hospice nurse, so death is part of my daily work life. I had been called to sit with a family while my patient was dying, not an unusual request in my line of work.

My patient was a widower who had also lost his only child to cancer a few years back. His niece and nephew were waiting for the grandchildren to arrive. The niece remarked that it seemed so unfair to the man to be dying alone after he, himself had so many losses. The nephew was outside on his cellphone arranging transportation for the out of town grandkids, I was sitting with the niece. Nephew came inside saying he was going to the motel to pick up two of the kids, I asked him to help me straighten the room to make room for visitors.

After the nephew left, I performed a quick once-over, and noticed a sweet looking young lady standing in the doorway, I assumed the kids had started arriving. I made brief eye contact with the girl, and stepped around her to give her privacy with her grandpa.Back at the dining room table, talking with the niece, she again mentioned the sad fact that he was dying alone. I reminded her about the girl in the whice she replied, "There's nobody back there." I walked back to look...there was only the dying man. I described the girl, we looked through family photos, but could not find anyone resembling the girl I saw. The niece said her husband was talking to a woman outside, but when he returned, he said he was talking to no one.

I looked AT the young girl, not through her; we made eye contact. I have not seen her since...but I suspect I will....someday. Suzanne


I work at a print shop where there are a variety of smells (ink, etc.) or sometimes no aromas at all. I also have a weak sense of smell. This morning, when there were no customers and the owners of the business were in other parts of the office and shop, I smelled a strong fragrance of flowers. No one had sprayed anything and no one was wearing perfume or cologne. The scent was as if I had walked into a roomful of flowers or like when someone brings a lot flowers into a room.

My mother Went Away on 1-12-09, and my friend's mother Went Away on 1-18-10. Until the last couple of dreams in which I could see my mother, she was pretty much in the same condition she was in at home, except, in the dream, she would be silent and kind of neutral with everything going on around her. (She was elderly, but ambulatory and responsive in life.) Over the last 2 nights when I dreamed of Mom, she was on a higher level and in the background, standing, and I could see her in a position where she could observe what was going on in my dream.

When I smelled the flowers today (5/21), it was about 10:50-10:55 a.m. I called my friend to see if anything weird had happened for her recently because she has experienced some phenomena too. I didn't get to speak to her until 11:50 a.m. She said she was in her mother's garden and her son had removed a keepsake ornament. I asked her when this transpired and she said it was about an hour previously, which turned out to be the same time I smelled the floral fragrance at work.

Neither one of us had any idea what the other was doing and there was no way we could have corroborated on this. I just thought it was interesting timing. Being moms, of course both of our mothers loved flowers. Michael

NOTE: both readers would appreciate feedback on their experiences...Lon

Reader Mail: A Hospice Visitor / The Fragrance of Flowers
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